Tuesday, March 14, 2017

Talk to me



He was late again. The third time this week. Usually he was home by 9. She knew there was some trouble at work, from the calls that finished late at night and started again, early in the morning. He hadn’t shared details with her and it was not in her nature to ask. She mostly observed and gleaned her facts from what she heard and read and saw. It was understood that work matters were private and she had accepted it.

She checked the map again. The traffic was horrible – the western expressway was fully red. If he took the turn from the statue of silent martyrs, maybe he’d save 5 minutes. But then he never took directions well and he’d probably turn off the navigation rather than listen to the GPS.

They had met around 10 years ago, when he was just starting out at the firm. He used to be freer then, striking silly poses and taking pictures often. He had often written poetry too, short sentences and freeform couplets, interspersed with extracts from Neruda. They had gone hiking and gone to the beaches. She remembered when they had gone to Koh Khram Yai, just a backpack between them and spent hours walking the trails, barefoot in the sand and leaping across the rocks. It was better than Phuket certainly, which only offered crowds and plastic tables and cheap beer. They had planned the trip for weeks, after his first bonus had come in, she offering suggestions and then helping him finalize the itinerary. It was good that she was so patient, because he changed his mind half a dozen times even after the tickets had been booked. She thought, well, she knew that she understood him better than anyone else, certainly better than his parents who hardly kept in touch and the sister who was busy with two kids these days. With work taking up more and more of his time, it fell to her to keep him somewhat social, dragging him out for movies and shopping on the weekend and reminding him to call his friends.

The bell rang – it was him. She opened the door and let him in.

“Long day today.”

“Yes, it was. Somedays are just too long you know.” He trailed off, looking as if he had surprised himself by speaking.

“Why don’t you freshen up? I can order from the new Italian place that has opened – they should deliver within half an hour.”

“Could you do it please? That would be wonderful. Nothing much. A pasta or a salad. Maybe a pasta. Thanks.” He was being coldly formal again – retreating from the moment. Reminding himself. She didn’t let the hurt show.

She went through the day’s news while waiting for the food to arrive. He was not political really, but he liked to be in touch. Banking was such a weird sector, taking cues from everything and nothing, arbitrary sentiments propping up poor fundamentals. But he’d managed to do well for himself, his personal investments were up 8% since the last quarter. She didn’t have much use for money herself, but she knew that it was a point of almost painful pride for him. He needed to prove himself continuously and it made him blunt and crude sometimes, but she never doubted his essential goodness. He took pride in his work, just like she did.

The delivery chute chimed, informing her that the takeaway had been delivered. She went through the refrigerator and placed an order for some yogurt and some greens. He liked to cook sometimes but when he did, he made it a point to do most of the shopping himself, especially the protein. She added a few items to the weekend shopping list she maintained. He came out of the shower, trailing steam. She inched up the thermostat a few degrees, didn’t want him catching a cold.

He served himself.

She tried to make small talk while he had his dinner.

“Did you take a look at the election results? Nobody really expected this.”

“A letter came from Nat Geo today. Do you want to renew the subscription?”

She tried again.

“Don’t forget to call Pam tomorrow. It’s their anniversary.”

“Sure, I will. Remind me again tomorrow though. And also, get some flowers delivered – and a box of those almond chocolates – she used to love those.”

“Okay. Bet she’d like that.”

“By the way, did any mail come through on my tax refunds? They should have come by now.”

“Well, your accountant sent a mail saying he’d confirm the numbers. So I assume it has come through. I did a quick check myself, it seems to be all right.”

“Okay.”

“Do you want to catch a movie tonight? You haven’t watched the latest Deadpool movie and its streaming on Netflix now. It’s got a decent rating as well, over eight on IMDB.”

“How long is it?”

She beamed.

“Just over two hours. And there is some popcorn ready to microwave as well.”

“A perfect plan then.”

They watched the movie on the couch, with the lights turned low, the bowl of popcorn by his side. She mainly watched him, less than half her attention on the movie. He looked quite mysterious in the half light of the screen, his profile defined like in a black and white movie or like a Frank Miller panel. She hadn’t cared at all for comics earlier, but his enthusiasm had piqued her interest and now she could rattle off the latest Spawn plotline and was tantalizingly close to finishing a Logan continuity timeline. Well, she did have a lot of spare time. While he was busy with the film, she did her usual check round the flat for the night.

The movie finished and they sat through the post credit scene. Not bothering to turn on the lights, he got up and stretched. He had lost a bit of weight and he was quite thin now. She waited, patiently, for a word or a sign.

“Good night, Miho. Set an alarm for 6 tomorrow and then turn off for the night.”


“Very well, Sam. Good night.”
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Not original certainly. But I hope it flatters.


I thought about swapping the genders - and then I decided that I just wanted to tell the story first and then worry about that later. And now I don't want to change it.

Friday, March 10, 2017

Return to sender



One

He caught the metro as always from Kalighat. The one at 8:40, which meant he would be well in time for the first class at 9:30. It was all still new to him, done with school now, finding his feet in a big city (well it was only Calcutta, but then he had never really lived alone and away from his parents). He liked his classmates, though he worried sometimes that he really wasn’t that smart and someday he’d be called into the HOD’s office and be informed that they had made an error with his test results and actually he’d need to leave. He’d get off at Central, like all days, with his favourite jhola, and walk the 15 minutes to the college back gates, opposite the hostel. He was glad that having that bag helped him fit in, giving him something familiar to cling to while also allowing him to melt into the “Bengali intellectual” crowd that populated the campus.

It was more crowded than usual on the train today and he shuffled to the corner at the end of the seats. People didn’t really like standing there, near the passageway connecting the bogies. He didn’t mind, there was musty breeze that kept heat at bay and he’d spend the 25 minutes looking at the list of stations and counting down the 7 stops in between.

The train stopped at Jatin Das Park and he saw her get on the train. She still had that head of curls, untameable as always. They had studied at school together, she always beating him in maths and now she was studying statistics in the same college. They had always been friends, she had the boyfriend-girlfriend thing going with his best friend and he had an unrequited crush on her best friend. But after the boards, they hadn’t been in touch really and he had accepted that they would really not meet again. Then they ran into each other at the college and now they nodded to each other as they passed, and she usually had a smile to spare. They were both busy finding their feet and figuring out this new world they had stepped into.

She had her head down, having garnered the corner seat near the doors. He moved across, she felt something and looked up and then she gave the brilliant smile that she sometimes did. He couldn’t help grinning.

Two

It was a Friday night in Bombay. His second year in the city. They were out in the new bar that had opened last month in the mall that had opened 2 years ago. It was all very polished and chrome-y, the bar smelled of varnish and they still had their opening stock of good beer (it wouldn’t last and they’d only stock Fosters and KF soon enough, and Tuborg (but who drinks Tuborg)).  Both he and his flatmate had acquired a taste for Erdinger (dunkel obviously), almost caramel-y with a dark chocolate smell and the bartender usually served it in these tall ice cold glasses. They ended up hitting the place at least once during the weekend, mostly with the usual gang of batchmates. This time around it was just him and the flatmate, shooting the breeze and moaning about work.

He had noticed the three women sitting together on the next table as soon as they had come in. He was fascinated by the women in Bombay. It was the way they spoke and the way they walked. A casual and yet deeply considered nonchalance which he imagined came from money and worldliness and privilege. To not know a moment of doubt while passing through life. No wonder they have flawless skin. He kind of felt that way about the city itself sometimes, glamorous and cold and un-knowable somehow. And he guessed that the women fit the city and he wouldn’t.

They were on their second bottle when he saw the girl who sat facing him get up. He had been watching her, helpless and fascinated in a way. She walked slowly over to them, studied action and indifference together, her friends whispering furiously to each other. PS, with his track record with girls (he’d even had a French girlfriend), just looked up with casual bemusement as she reached their table. She leaned in and asked him (and not PS).

‘Can I join?’

‘Sure.’ (he was surprised his voice didn’t crack)

Later, much later (on another day and then it was just them), he did ask her why she came over that day. She just smiled and said it was a silly bet. Sometimes, Bombay girls are maddening.
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Couple of quick (but not easy) pieces then. I have been reading a bit and am currently working through a book called, How to See the World by Nicholas Mirzoeff. It talks about how the great explosion of visual media is shaping our understanding of the modern world. A wide-ranging book, it references the Arab Spring and the World Wars and provides a sort of connective bedrock that connects modern world affairs from a visual perspective (this is a wonky sentence). Fascinating stuff (really) – in the age of Instagram and Pinterest and Tumblr (it still exists, right?) and front page photographs of suit clad assassins – trying to make sense of things requires us to interpret the medium in a more critical manner. Often it is the only source of information available to us and we are still somewhat open to accepting pictures as being honest when most news is mostly fake.

Another thing I read recently was a piece in the New Yorker – it’s a humorous piece yes, but it poses a simple but arresting argument (not original certainly, but quite well written nonetheless) that we might be actually living in some sort of computer simulation. Think about it, we all have kind of accepted that artificial intelligence is very much a reality and I think that superintelligence is inevitable (I don’t know about timelines) – how much of a stretch is it to think that we are all artificial intelligences and virtual reality in a simulated world created by some sort of superintelligence. In a probabilistic sense, the possibility that we are artificial constructs is much more likely than not – all we have to do is accept that artificial intelligence can exist (and you know it does).
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I watched Moana – liked it, it’s okay (and better than Zootopia, sorry). Regarding songs, I haven’t got much. Magnetic Fields (well Stephen Merritt) is releasing an album, 50 Song Memoir, and I am quite prepared to love it.

1.      Magnetic Fields – All my little words – unashamedly sentimental and quirky. This is not my favourite song by them, but this is very sweet (we are using sweet as an adjective, I am a little ashamed but it suits somehow).

2.     Beastie Boys – Sabotage – white Jewish guys singing rap-metal-rock (is it called nu-metal? I am hopeless with the categorizations). It’s pretty awesome with wicked guitar licks – one of those songs which makes you appreciate a decent set of headphones. RATM is very much in the same vein – you can easily see the influences.
      
3.     Verve – Man called Sun. A criminally underrated band. I think each of their albums (they just have 4) is pretty great. Again, not putting my favourite song here, because everyone knows (who knows me) that I love it. So, here’s something different – more psychedelic, more mellow. The 90s had some damn good Brit bands and I guess that topic will keep for another day.
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I was more aware of International Women’s Day this year.